Forty

I met Jimmy Hewitt when we were 14. We became fast friends and have stayed thus for two and a half decades-plus. When his wife, Maury, called and asked if I wanted to come to SF to surprise him for his 40th birthday I was beside myself with giddiness. Her thoughtfulness and sneakiness blew me away. Too boot, she managed to get Nathan Anderson, another one of our closest friends, in on the occasion and worked it out so we could fly there on her frequent flier miles. The set up was perfect and Nathan and I arrived at SFO within a half hour of each other. Maury picked us up and baited Jimmy back home from a bike ride where we surprised him by springing out of bed when he came into his room. It was priceless.

Given that three of the four of us are tea toddlers, the evening was very mellow. We dropped the kids off with grandma and went out to Goat Hill for some pizza and a lot of good conversation. I'm grateful for the opportunity on so many levels. To be with such amazing people, in a great city like San Francisco, and celebrating Jimmy's 40th birthday - a milestone, no doubt - was surreal. The clouds draping the city, conversation drenched in years of friendship, and fluidity of the time between last face to face visits eddied around the motions of the evening. Togetherness with loved ones to celebrate Jimmy's oldness.



Round two of the surprise was a surprise party on Saturday night. Nathan and I held Jimmy's attention and kept him from the homestead long enough for Maury to sneak friends and family in. Once again we got him pretty good with a roomful of "surprise" yelling folks and a huge spread of food to dive in to.

A big part of the surprise was having Ken Fish in the mix - he is another friend I've been close with since I was 15. There were more friends in the mix that also filled the scene with meaning for me beyond Jimmy's birthday, but it was all within the context of Jimmy's celebration. Togetherness. Instead of spreading out to talk to everyone, I got right into hanging with Fish and his husband Robbie. Maybe a little guilt about not saying hello to everyone, but it was great to reconnect with Fish and Robbie.

A few of us, including Lola Bell and Charles Carbone, went out on the town in North Beach after the party. The city was raging and it was fun for such a homebody like myself to go out and be in the center of the night life in the city. A late night with thundering music, dancing ladies, and more great times with friends fit perfectly into the weekend.



Maury was unreal in her ability to let Jimmy just cruise. The kids spent a lot of time with us, but she made sure they were covered when we went off on our long walks through the city and they were not up for it. A huge breakfast feast on Sunday morning started the day. Fish re-joined us. We got to check out City Hall and a little holiday festival on the lawn out front with the kids. And then we spent the afternoon walking the city - one of my favorite things to do.

Taking time to enjoy the company of such great people was inspiring. We are all at challenging times in our lives and it was cathartic to be able to talk to my friends about their challenges and sharing my own. Six kids between the three of us, three wives, and our own personalities and circumstances have certainly changed the way we perceive life. I am grateful beyond words for such a nice weekend, the graciousness Maury extended, and the togetherness I was a part of.